Life in Australia

It's been a long time since i,ve updated. Life here has been wonderful. Still havn't get used to the idea of the sun rising at 5.30 A.M and sun setting at 6 P.M. Things here are rather slow. Shops close early by around 6 or 7 and weekends they close even earlier by about 3. Where in Singapore, it's the direct opposite.

I wish I could stay here forever. The weather's been really good. I love the weather here. Been enjoying myself the past week with visits to Dream World, Koala reserve and such. Love to spent all my time with her around me. We had lots of fun. Her school starts this week after a week break, and it's back to working for me too.

Receive all the other conductor scores for the outdoor, thanks to felix who fedex it to me. Now we have the music for the whole show. What we need now is the formation. mmm...been working nights on these the past few days. Can't seem to stop working even when i'm on holiday!

There one thing I miss in singapore though and that is MY CAR! hahaha.... been taking public transport here, something i havn't been doing for the past years. Oh ya, when the train in brisbane stop, you have to press thebutton to open the door. I didn't know it and was standing there like an idiot, until somebody press it for me...hahaha....Before going anyway, checking bus times is also a must, as some bus services run 1 hour apart. Their timing for bus are to the minute. Very efficient!

The feeling here is really relaxing. People will justdance on the streets and otherswill just join in. They are really open people and are not shy or anything. The scenery of the city is really very pretty. OH! THE BEEF is cheap and wonderfully tasty. hahaha.... oh no...getting fatter from eating meat everyday!

So many things to do here but everything is so expensive. Climbing bridge, sailing, snorkling, Absiling, Gold Coast, Beaches, so many things to do and see. Still have 2 weeks here. Little time left!

This trip is also a chance to break of from live and re-think what i want to do with my life. Things havn't been as good as i want them to be since i ORD from army. Life has been tough, as always. Many things and events have been happening that is slowly eating me away. somehow, i lost the drive, the determination to succeed, to be the best that i can be. I know i not performing to the best that i can, but somehow i can't seem to do anything about it.

I NEED TO FIND MYSELF!

Goodbye Singapore, Hello Australia

Had a really good flight to Australia. The In-Flight Entertainment was so good, I thought I was never going to sleep. But God, was I wrong. I slept throughout most of the journey. I was only then did I realised how tired I was. I watch "The Proposal", "Wall-E" and "State of Play", all halfway through, I fell asleep. Haha. Must have been the alcohol on board too. Had red wine and vodka for most of the trip. Hahaha... Didn't know it was free flow, until the person beside me kept ordering. Follow suit..:)

Things here are really expensive. The cab fare from airport to her place cost like AUS$ 43. The distance was only like 30KM. Enjoying the weather here, WONDERFUL! Feels like air-con is on in the whole country. around 22 - 28 degrees. Shiokness to the max. If only Singapore has this type of weather, can march whole day also not tired. HAHA!

The are many foreign students here which in turn lead to many foreign restaurant. When to have dinner at a Korean Restaurant. WOOOO! Wonderful food. The people here are very friendly too. Want to stay here forever man.

Eat Microwave food for most of the time, Her invention. Can't believe that Microwave food can produce such nice food. AMAZING! She has left for school, holiday only start next week. Been thinking and planning of formation here too, but somehow mental block. Can't seem to get anything done. Time to focus. :)

Off to Brisbane

Couldn't Sleep the whole night. Really excited to go on an overseas trip. Come to think of it, it's has been a whole FIVE YEARS since I last took a plane. The last trip i remember was with Springfield to Thailand for the Band competition in 2004.

Currently at the airport, waiting to board the plane. Finally, I going to see her soon. :)

A Saturday Without Band

A Saturday without Band feels so empty. The feeling just doesn't feel good, but i bet the members must be damn happy, finally, can sleep late into the morning. For me, I slept all the way till 4.30PM. That's like almost 14 hours of sleep. Didn't realise I was so tired, thinking the week of planning has been taking a toll on me.

When out with felix and Kai Yee to suntec for some gaming convention. Ended up shopping with felix. Haha... but it was only then that it dawn on me that I HAVE NOT BEEN IN A SHOPPING MALL SINCE CHEN PEI LEFT! Then, I reflected and YES, I have been spending ALL and I mean ALL my waking hours on BAND, BAND and BAND! Although, I have no complains about that, since I love my Job. And my job is my life. Why not? Coincidentally, one of my friends send me the following E-Mail.

This was a speech made by Pulitzer Prize-winning author, Anna Quindlen at the Graduation ceremony of an American University where she was awarded an Honarary PhD.

"I'm a novelist. My work is human nature. Real life is all I know.

Don't ever confuse the two, your life and your work. You will walk out of here this afternoon with only one thing that no one else has. There will be hundreds of people out there with your same degree: there will be thousands of people doing what you want to do for a living. But you will be the only person alive who has sole custody of your life. Your particular life. Your entire life. Not just your life at a desk or your life on a bus or in a car or at the computer. Not just the life of your mind, but the life of your heart. Not just your bank accounts but also
your soul.

People don't talk about the soul very much anymore. It's so much easier to write a resume than to craft a spirit. But a resume is cold comfort on a winter's night, or when you're sad, or broke, or lonely, or when you've received your test results and they're not so good.

Here is my resume: I am a good mother to three children. I have tried never to let my work stand in the way of being a good parent. I no longer consider myself the centre of the universe. I show up. I listen. I try to laugh. I am a good friend to my husband. I have tried to make marriage vows mean what they say. I am a good friend to my friends and them to me. Without them, there would be nothing to say to you today, because I would be a cardboard cut out. But I call them on the phone and I meet them for lunch. I would be rotten, at best mediocre, at my job if
those other things were not true.


You cannot be really first rate at your work if your work is all you are. So here's what I wanted to tell you today: Get a life. A real life, not a manic pursuit of the next promotion, the bigger pay cheque, the larger house. Do you think you'd care so very much about those things if you blew an aneurysm one afternoon or found a lump in your breast?


Get a life in which you notice the smell of salt water pushing itself on a breeze at the seaside, a life in which you stop and watch how a red-tailed hawk circles over the water, or the way a baby scowls with concentration when she tries to pick up a sweet with her thumb and first finger.


Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. And remember that love is not leisure, it is work. Pick up the phone. Send an email. Write a letter. Get a life in which you are generous. And realize that life is the best thing ever, and that you have no business taking it for granted. Care so deeply about its goodness that you want to spread it around. Take money you would have
spent on beer and give it to charity. Work in a soup kitchen. Be a big brother or sister. All of you want to do well. But if you do not do good too, then doing well will never be enough.

It is so easy to waste our lives, our days, our hours, and our minutes.
It is so easy to take for granted the colour of our kids' eyes, the way the melody in a symphony rises and falls and disappears and rises again.

It is so easy to exist instead of to live.

I learned to live many years ago. I learned to love the journey, not the destination. I learned that it is not a dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee you get. I learned to look at all the good in the world and try to give some of it back because I believed in it, completely and utterly. And I tried to do that, in part, by telling others what I had learned. By telling them this: Consider the lilies of the field. Look at the fuzz on a baby's ear. Read in the back yard with the sun on your face.

Learn to be happy. And think of life as a terminal illness, because if you do, you will live it with joy and passion as it ought to be lived".

Maybe it's time I get a life. But then again, what if I dun treat my job as a job? Something to think about. Maybe this one month break from band will do me good? I hate exam breaks. Although sometimes the students can be really problematic and devilish at times. I still miss them. They are just so full of surprises sometimes. And some of the students are just so lovable, that you can't help but miss them..hahaha..

Today had been a break from band. Watch Soccer late into the night, something that I have not done for ages. Fantastic to watch soccer with felix, ESPECIALLY IF IT'S A LIVERPOOL MATCH! His expressions are one in a million. :) Feels good, to just sometimes forget about band and responsibilities.

Can't wait to meet her in about 48 hours time? Hahaha.. it's been 2 months away from her, and it definately feels weird. :) Although we talk on the phone for hours everyday. It just not the same.

Oh ya, Band practice on friday was wonderful. I FINALLY GET ON MY OWN DONE!!!!! YES! On the music make sense. But the feeling of the song is still not there. It's such an emotional piece, and if only the band can march out there and bring out the emotion and meaning of the piece. I will be damn happy. After all, the objective of music is not competition. It when your music can touch the audience heart. Then the objective of music is fulfilled. I hope I can bring that different to PYMB. Music that touches the heart!

Sleepless Night AGAIN!

Just had the last practice before exam break with Bedok Town, Fell in Love with "Into the Winter of 1730".. Simple song with nice melodies. Been very super duper busy with planning. Havn't shut down my computer in almost 1 week, due to using of finale demo version. Time to get the original version. $$?

Hope the score works out tomorrow. Quite excited about the outdoor next year, but at the same time a little worried with the new concept that we are gonna do. Will "Les Miserables" work? Mmmmm... Trying to get some ideas back into focus and prespective.

Man, I can't wait for this week to end, and then AUSTRALIA!!!! HERE I COME!

Time for a little nap before the reckee for Indoor Stadium later in the morning.

Same Old Day

Once again, It's already 5 A.M and here I am finishing up bits and pieces of the formation ideas that the group have generate. Spent more than 3 hours this afternoon, just to tranpose a score from Db Concert to F Concert. Had to use finale, and since I lost my installation disk, I had to use a demo version from the internet. AND IT CAN'T SAVE! So I can't save any files and i can't off my computer too. And it can only print one page of score and so no conductor score. SO DUPER HAPPY WITH I FINISH IT. IT HAD BEEN A CHORE!! Oh well, just have to live with it, since I can't find the installation disk. Been looking for it since Friday.

This afternoon, one of my former students Jun Xiang came and talk to me. He read my previous blog post and came to give me some comments. He was one of my most naughty students, a so called "Black Sheep" of Springfield Band then. Who dun care for rules, dun care for descipline and morale of the band. I remember, back then he had lots of potential in Secondary One, and I wanted to groom him to be a future leader of the band. However, along the way, something went wrong, and he changed. I wouldn't say he was a bad student, but it's just his attitute and character was just not condusive to the band.

He told me the following:

"Just guide them the best you can, they will only realise when they grow up. take me for example, I so called hated you, but when i grow up. I realise, was you did was for my own good. If I didn't went through those, I wont be sensible and mature right night. Maybe ended up in somewhere negative and I got to thank you for tat."

"the kids are still young..they need old ppl to guide them..yes, they may hated you for a period.. but when they group up, they will start to think what is good and wad is bad for them..and i'm pretty sure they will understand. its like wad i used to do when im a kid. they need somebody to guide them well and tat will be you. whenever i think back, it leaves me with an great impression. the best time of my life!"

I feel so thankful to hear those words from him. Time passed fast, thinking back, it's has been 4 years since I last taught him in 2005. He already in National Service. His words reminded me of the "Starfish Story"

Many starfish washed up on shore. A young boy started picking them up and throwing them back into the ocean. Someone saw what he was doing and told him that it was pointless, that there were too many to save, that it wouldn't make a difference. Throwing another starfish into the sea, the little boy responded, "It makes a difference to this one."

Talking to him, gave me some much needed will and strength to continue making a difference in my students life. I mustn't lose track of why I choose to be a Band Director in the first place. Yes, to teach them to understand and appreciate music, BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY! To inculcate in them values and life skills that our education system doesn't provide for. As much as I want my band to do well in SYF, ultimatly Band is still a CCA. A place for character development, a place to learn the right values in life. I mustn't give up, no matter how hard the circumstances are.

Yes, I may not be the person with the most upright or the best character. But at least, I do within my limit best to instill in them the right values and character.

Talking about that. Finally today, I learned from Edwin the reason a few of my closest friend left my in the beginning of this year. They were unhappy about promises I made but didn't keep. They were unhappy about me not being the old me, unhappy about me not meeting up to their expectations. Generally, they said I have change for the worst.

That is something I do not deny. Well, people change. Some for the better, some for the worst. I know during a certain period of time, I had lost my sense of direction and make mistakes. I am afterall only human. May i suppose to be PERFECT all the time? Even if I do step out of line, how will I know if my so -called friends are not there to tell me?

It's so true when they say,

IN PROSPERITY OUR FIRENDS KNOW US; IN ADVERSITY WE KNOW OUR FRIENDS!

I do not blame them, for I have myself to blame for my attitute towards them. I was not given the chance to apologise, neither was I given the chance to explain myself. They just left. At the point in time where I was at my lowest point in life. May I hadn't been a good enough friend to them. Well, after all, I'm only human. But I believe I have done my part as a friend. When they bang my car, which cost my insurance premiums to go up by $864 a year, I just let it go. When they spoilt my car bumper, and have to sell my old car for $1000 less, I just let it go. When they were my students, I taught and train them the best I could. In leadership, in music and in life, I believe I gave my best.

Well, God is fair, when I have high expectation of others, others also have high expectation of me. I lost friends, I've let them down. I'm sorry.

Mistakes/failure are lessons for us. They make us stronger, and better people to be able to carry on our journey to success.

End of Holidays

The past 3 days have been really busy when bands having full day practices. As well as having sleepless nights and formation planning till the wee hours of the day.

Had band practice with bedok town 2 days back, which was right after their band BBQ the night before. Surprised to see that all turn up for practice. Since they are not used to full day practice, could feel that they were rather restless in the afternoon. Introduce to them the world of marching band by showing them a DCI video. The BM, Eka even went further and research it on the internet and could tell me who was in first place this year. Haha.. he even said that marching band were more interesting. I think he will definately change his opinion when he is in one. I played the song "Spanish Brass" with them. Bring back lots of memories as that was the song I played for every performance throughtout my secondary school years. It still sound as nice. :) Tried with them "Into the Winter of 1730" too, and almost finish the whole song. Time with them seems to breeze by.

On friday, I worked out "On My Own" with PY. Thanks to asyraf, the percussion linkage was done. Now, I have to change the Key of the song for the climax part. I could already see it in my head, the type of formation I want. Ask a few piano students to help me with it. Wah... nowadays, they can't improvise on chords with a given melody. Well, just have to get it done myself. I remembered previous years, one of the alumni from ping yi, could play the whole repertoire we had for outdoor on the piano immediately upon listening to it. hahaha.. now the kids different liao la. C7 chord resolve to what chord also don't know. Really love the les miserables song. It's in my head all day long. Time to get it out of my head and into reality.

Spent a whole day at East Coast Park today for PY band outing. As usual only about 70% of the band is there. Disappointed, but then what can i do. Told them to go for lunch in their groups, also nobody follows. Haiz. Must be I have been to lenient with them. Where's the high discipline and strong morale and camaraderie that PYMB once had. Just a few example, in the past, where will students dare to go out of the strict dress code that PYMB always enforce in school and, even for outside activities? Now. It's rampant! Makes my blood boil, but then what can I say. If they have no basic discipline to follow attire, it really shows something is wrong with the character. What the hell, IS THE SCHOOL A PLACE FOR FASHION PARADE! If you like to be VAIN!!! GO JOIN SOME BLOODY DANCE CLUB!!!! I seriously don't need these people to make my blood boil man. But anyway, now I just console myself that there are others to make an effort to follow the rules. Maybe, I'm old liao. The alumni have been saying, I am getting more and more lenient over the years. They told me, in the past, if this happens, they will really get HELL from me for a simple mistake. Hahaha... see... Old already!

It seems, all the problems are happening just because of a few "black sheep". As it has always been said, THE STRENGTH OF THE CHAIN IS AS STRONG AS IT'S WEAKEST LINK! The chain can be make up of thousands of hard iron rings, but just one ring is made of plastic, the chain will break! ISN'T LIFE SO UNFAIR! But well, that is life. No matter how much or how good the rest of the members are, our strength is judged by the few "black sheep" that destory our concept of discipline, that destory the morale and camaraderie of the band. It feels like deja vu. It happened to springfield too, when they were strong. Maybe it's nature way to balancing life? haha... Always when something is successful, it will just take a few people to come in and destory it. Destroy the camaraderie that has been built for so long over the years. Even if those people were just a small handful, it affects the whole organisation. Sometimes, I wish they will change, but then again, it's the society now la. Generations of kids are just getting weaker and weaker. I really pity the whole band, as this small group is affecting the GOOD that they are doing.

Damn long since I spent a day under the sun. Got burned. I think the last time was in my army days? hahaha.... Anyway, was very happy with the way the committe was working and planning. Especially with the BM and DM. They know their priorities and get things done. However, was pretty disappointed with some of the assistants. Even the teacher made the same observation as me. Mmmmm... when even Wah Jing and Tahir disapproved of my choice, i got to ponder on it.

Waited with a few of the malays to break fast at BK. Talk about outdoor, and was really surprised to hear that all of them prefer outdoor to indoor. Hahaha... And spoke to Azwan the difference between a being "strict" and being a "bastard". Hope he will learn something from it. Wanted to send them home but too bad I'm not driving a Bus. Can't fit all of them.. It's good to sometimes hear of stories of their past on how they skip band when they were in sec 1 and stuff. Sometimes, I just wish I got all the time to hear every single member story. If only I had 72 hours a day. :) Oh ya, i got a cute dolphin soft toy from "Environmental Club" and gang. They got it using only $4 from the machine. So lucky of them. I always thought the machine was to cheat money. They managed to get one! It's enjoying the seat in my new car now.. :)...hahaha

Can't wait for get this week over and done with. I need a much needed break from band. Can't wait to go Australia to visit her too. :)